Rightness without humility is not enough. I have a friend who is always right about everything. If anyone asks for advice, she will tell me what they should do, how they should do it, and when it should be done. She is generally honest, and actually has the best interests of the person she’s advising uppermost in her mind.
When someone fails to follow her advice and things don’t go well, “I told you (or him, or her, if she’s talking about some other person who didn’t obey orders) so.” is quickly heard. It wouldn’t be so bad if “I told you so.” was all that she said. It never is. It’s quickly followed by lots of “ought to’s” and “should have’s”. After each of those phrases, it is directly stated or implied that the words “listened to me” delineate the proper course of action.
I ask her advice ever less frequently. In fact, while I sometimes find myself avoiding her, I am thankful for having known her.
As a result of what I’ve learned from her, if anyone asks me for advice, I’m very tentative, rarely over-positive, and more interested in seeing what they think should be done. Since that’s probably what they’re going to do, anyway, getting that desire identified quickly will bring the issue to the conclusion that was going to be reached more rapidly, thereby leaving more time to fix it if that solution doesn’t work. Since most problems have more than one answer, their solution usually works.
