Beetles, Beetles, and More Beetles

There are an astonishing 400,000 kinds of beetles. They range in size from giant, rain forest beetles nearly a foot long to tiny beetles, smaller than ladybugs. Amazingly, a third of all animal programs are classifiable as “beetles”.

Why so many beetles?

Catholic Fundamentalists think that “Beetle Design” may be a requisite course for The Loving Programmer’s angelic programming assistants. One can imagine the angel responsible for training new programmers, Dr. Principality, explaining to newly enrolled angels in the School of Being Design at Programming HQ: “The Loving Programmer wants to be sure that you are good, capable programmers before entrusting you with His important work in The Creation Program. So, you have been admitted to this advanced class of ‘Being Programmers’.

“I, myself, am an early graduate of this school, having successfully completed the course by having written, programmed, and downloaded the famously successful June Bug Program within The Creation Program. If you work hard and write a good beetle program, when you graduate you may end up in charge of programming for one of the new galaxies in just a few thousand years.”

That may be why there is such an unnaturally large number of beetles.

Author's Notes:

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