Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp. files for bankruptcy. Where is Little Fred?

Suddenly, it all came crashing down! Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp. was forced to file for bankruptcy.

Hundreds of employees were televised carrying boxes of personal belongings out of the building. Many were crying. Their future employment opportunities were bleak.

The business community was fascinated!

“We all believed in Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp.! Everyone on Wall Street thought they were making money! We were wrong!” TV commentators commented.  For several days, the story was headlined on National News. The Internet was abuzz.

Little Fred and the Executive Staff literally disappeared. No one could find them! The huge Madison Avenue Skyscraper was listed for sale.


News reached the thousands of denominations who’d based their businesses on Little Fred’s Protestant Marketing Plans. “Our life savings are gone! So is our income! We, and our Denominations have become laughingstocks in the truest sense of the word!”, cried men and women who’d purchased Protestant Marketing Plan Licences and Franchises from Little Fred.

Many lapsed Catholics were so disgusted they went back to The Catholic Church!

Banks wrote thousands of Foreclosure Letters.

Many of the denominations were in rented shopping mall spaces.  Landlords prepared eviction notices.  Economic collapse spread to huge real estate investment companies!

“We’ve already lost half of our tenants to the internet and big box stores! Now, hardly any of us can make payroll and mortgage payments! Little Fred should be put in jail! Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp! has hurt a lot of people!”


In every State, and many nations, Attorneys General filed suits against Little Fred and Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp.! Federal Marshals, Police Departments, Sheriffs, Prosecutors, and Law Enforcement Agencies all over the globe were looking for Little Fred!

They could not find him.


Little Fred had disappeared.  A young reporter, working for one of the remaining newspapers, got a tip.  An anonymous whisper on his cell phone let him know:  “Little Fred is in a Jesuit Monastery in the Midwest.”

The reporter and his editor agreed:   “This is big news!”  The publisher agreed to cover expenses, “No matter how long it takes!”.

After several weeks, the reporter finally found Little Fred.  He was in plain sight.  Little Fred was running a weed-eater around the base of a statue of St. Ignatius Loyola.  It stood just inside a small field of wheat next to  the long driveway that led to the Jesuit Monastery.


“What are you doing here?”, asked the astonished reporter.

Little Fred shut off the weed-eater. “I am a Jesuit.”, Little Fred explained.

The impact of his words sank in. “Are you telling me that the entire Global Protestant Marketing Plans Corp. was a Jesuit plot?”

“Yes, sir, I am.  500 years ago, Martin Luther left the Augustinian Order.  He became one of the first Jesuits.  He invented the first of The Global Protestant Marketing Plans.  I merely follow in his footsteps.”

“What!   What?  What!


Little Fred explained. “Jesus promised: ‘I come to divide.’ For 500 years, we Jesuits have been giving willful goats the excuses they need to justify willfully disobeying The Church-Founding Word of He Who Fulfilled The Prophecies:

‘And I say unto you thou art Peter and on this rock I build My Church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I give you the keys to The Kingdom of Heaven.’

“Jesus did ‘come to divide.’  Jesuits work for Jesus.  Our job is to help Him divide sheep from goats.  Protestantism is as simple as that.  For 500 years, all of Protestantism has been a Jesuit plot to divide willful goats from His obedient sheep.”

Little Fred started up the weed eater. He went back to work on the thistles growing in the wheat.

The interview was over.

Time was up.

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