One of Catholic Fundamentalism’s joys is contemplating its concept of defining God as the “Unprogrammed Programmer”. When we add to that the idea that He is able to program the building blocks of particles that He compiled into structures and beings. Then, we can look at the Book of Genesis and very reasonably see how He could have programmed all Creation is a week.

Today, only Catholic Fundamentalists explore this fascinating field. Soon, of course, some of the splinter groups will discover what we’ve done. They will promptly appropriate some of our ideas and apply them to their own types of Fundamentalism. But, for the past few years, we’ve had the field to ourselves and have been happily plowing, planting, and weeding.

Many have been reading these pages long enough to have become familiar with the basics, “The Programmer programmed all the carbon-14, fossils, etc., in order to give us free will. If He hadn’t given us a Creation to observe and freely conclude to be as old and remote from Him as we wanted, we could not truly be said to have free will.”

As it is, only Catholic Fundamentalists understand that the range of free will He programmed is so vast that many people can freely choose to believe that Creation is twenty billion years old, while we, who have a much greater appreciation of His awesome power, can reasonably say that He made the entire universe and all within it just seven to twelve thousand ago.

We may want to mention these theories to intelligent acquaintances, and ask for help disproving them. “I’ve been reading about this theory that God can program in three dimensions. According to those Catholic Fundamentalists, He programmed the universe like a huge, animated movie, except He programmed everything in real-time 3-D”

It’s fun to watch people wrestle with it. You may want to make a mental bet with yourself as to how long it will take someone to say: “That argument is circular”.

One may choose to cheerfully agree. “Yup. Biggest circle that there is. Everything fits inside it. “

Author's Notes:

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