Pastor Bobs: Jesus isn’t fair!

Pastor Bob: Sincere believers in my church get to Heaven.

Catholic Fundamentalist: But, Jesus clearly said “Thou art Peter and on this rock I build My Church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I give you The Keys to The Kingdom of Heaven.” Did He say that to you or to the man who invented your schism?

Pastor Bob: Well, if I’d have been there, He would have. It’s not my fault that I wasn’t there.

Catholic Fundamentalist: But, He did say that to the first leader of The Only Church He Founded. Why aren’t you in that Church?

Pastor Bob: Modern times need new approaches.

Catholic Fundamentalist: Jesus knew that there would be ‘modern times’. If He wanted lots of new churches, and there are 43,000 of them today and a hundred thousand over the past two thousand years, wouldn’t He have said so?

Pastor Bob: We only need to believe in Jesus and The Bible to get to Heaven.

Catholic Fundamentalist: Jesus said ‘From within people, from their hearts, come evil thoughts, unchastity, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, licentiousness, envy, blasphemy, arrogance, folly. All these evils come from within and they defile.’ If you think your church is just as good as The Only Church Jesus Founded, isn’t that an an example of ‘envy’ or ‘blasphemy’ or ‘arrogance’ or ‘folly’? Or all four?

Pastor Bob: My church is a faith-manifestation of my special gifts that were given to me by Jesus.

Catholic Fundamentalist: When Jesus publicly said ‘Thou art Peter and on this rock I build My Church. . .’, He did so in front of many credible witnesses. Did Jesus say that, out loud, to you or to the man who invented your denomination?”

Pastor Bob: Jesus speaks to my heart!

Catholic Fundamentalist: All the inventors of somewhat Christian denominations have all said the same thing. Their churches are all dying. Did Jesus want one church to last, or a hundred thousand embarrassments that come and go? Why doesn’t Jesus give you some proof, like an announcement in front of witnesses so unimpeachable they would rather die than recant? Then, we would know that you weren’t part of some silly, self-serving delusion.

Pastor Bob: I wish Jesus would come to my church and tell people what a good job I’m doing. But, He doesn’t. And, I know that He put things in The Bible like “If you don’t eat My Body and drink My Blood you do not have life in you.” Why did He say things like that? Our churches can’t change bread and wine into His Body and Blood. We weren’t given the power to forgive sins. That’s why there is one, universal agreement among us Pastor Bobs: Jesus isn’t fair!