The platitudes of Protestantism include: “I have a personal relationship with Jesus!” Some are taught to repeat “I have a personal relationship with Jesus!” as if it is meaningful. “Jesus and I went out to dinner. I ordered Ranch Dressing for my salad! Jesus said, ‘Good choice!’ No matter what I decide to do, Jesus says ‘Good choice!’ I love my personal relationship with Jesus!”
Some can’t remember all seven words in “I have a personal relationship with Jesus.” Marketing Plan Denominations have been designed for minds only able to remember three words. “Me ‘n Jesus!” sums up their theological capacity.
Brighter stars in the Protestant galaxy invent more complicated reasons to ignore The Only Church Jesus Founded. To maintain credibility and cash flows, they must avoid His clear call to Catholic Communion. When faced with the fact that Jesus said, EIGHTEEN TIMES, “If you do not eat My Body and drink My Blood you do not have life in you.”, Catholics are told, “We must not take that seriously because of the ‘Hermaneutics’ involved.”
I once met Reverend and Mrs. Herman Eutics. While Herman was telling me how smart I would be to join his denomination, Mrs. Eutics was picking my pocket!
When the Herman Eutics don’t work, Protestants who describe themselves as “remarkably intelligent.” talk about “exegesis“. When Catholics roll our eyes heavenwards, they insist our minds do not understand “exegesis” because we have fallen into the error of “non-textural context“.
Every pseudo-intellectual excuse is used when Catholics remind them about The Only Church Jesus Founded: “Verily, verily, I say unto you, thou art Peter and on this rock I build My Church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. I give you the keys to The Kingdom of Heaven.”
When Catholics suggest that those clear words of Jesus should be taken seriously, we hear the sputtering cacophony of Protestantism! “Bad Hermaneutics!”, “Simple-minded Exegesis!”, “Me ‘n Jesus!” “Invalid non-textural context!”, and “I have a personal relationship with Jesus!” are repeated in every possible order!
