Once, clean food. Now, clean money. The new Kosher.

Pork, and various other foods, are, and were, thought to be “unclean” by several religions. St. Peter’s vision convinced him that there was no unclean food. After Peter’s vision, the only thing that early Catholics were not allowed to eat was food that had been sacrificed to idols.

Catholic Fundamentalists believe that money which has been sacrificed to idols in the growing governmental temples is to be avoided, even when offered. For example, one of the side-chapels in the Temple of the Environmentalists is devoted to Ethanol, the high-tech Bacchus.

Ethanol is produced by burning about a gallon and a half of diesel fuel to make a gallon of ethanol out of grain. Each gallon of ethanol has 2/3s the BTUs of one gallon of diesel. The difference in cost is made up by taking three dollars, about half the actual cost of each gallon of ethanol, from bamboozled taxpayers.

To Catholic Fundamentalists, that’s an example of “unclean money”. Immersing oneself in such cash flows is an unholy Baptism that should be avoided so that we may avoid falling into the ongoing corruption of idol worship, thereby violating what The Programmer thought to be so important that He put it #1 in His list of operating instructions.

Just as we are commanded not to eat food which has been sacrficed to idols, so we should avoid money that has been similarly tainted.

Author's Notes:

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